but it was a strange, exhausting day. for one thing i spent 6 hours (and counting. tic. tock. tic.) doing art stuff. but of course thats not enough to threaten a nervous breakdown (none of this is really. well, for me it is. im fine when people die and stuff but llittle things mess me up. grrr. like if you had a cut on your gum, which is worse than a broken arm (in my experience). so thre is more.

someone mentioned im one of 'those people', meaning the people wh's art is depressiingly good (im not saying this with ego, because i dont believe it. but thats kinda the point. a bit) which kinda sparks somewhat of an idetity crisis. lil bit. guh (i write these sorts of words a lot. sorry, theyre just words that express the 'blah' im thinking).

oh yeah, elina smokes. which suprises me for some reason because ive never seen her at the smoking area place. though then i was enlightened to the vicious rivalry of 'th barrier' area and 'the curb' area. though....enlihghtened not so much. i have no idea what the curb is (other than mayhaps a curb)

oh yeah, fun analogy by person i dont know but other people do and she seems to know me so i played along (i doo hope thats her name). jamming with a guy she knows who is babysitting then going outside to have a cigarette and the two li' kids see her and cry and beg her to stop and the nine year old writes her a note about how the girl is her best friend and make her promise to cut down. hahaha.

which reminds me of another thing. theres something very bitter about mocking a person for the first time and just not being anle to stop yourself. it wasnt one of my crueler observations, just a sorta sing song "and you just have to keep drawing horses".........which seems really strange out of context. though it dosnt convince me i particularly like who i am.

and oh yeah! what is up with the form class in the art room?!? the guy michael is nicole's brother, and that guy gus is elanor's brother! and verity is still elliot's brother! how does this work out?!? im supposed to know everything!.............................eurgh.

and oh yeah (again), verity gave me a photo of her. i have absolutely no reason why! tis a pretty awesome photo though. she wanted to have it in the year book but it isnt allowed on account of it being too awesome.

this journal is to sort out my thoughts. i'll try and have something relevant next time

bbyeeee